Old habits, new scars ***may trigger***

[ciara]

ok. i confess. i used to cut. but the thing is i stopped and didnt even think about ever doing it agian. ever. i didnt want to. but now my best friend is pregnant and has cancer and may die from a fever. i could hold back any longer. i need help and i didnt know how to get it. i cut my arm in front of her. she totally flipped out and got out of her hospital bed. she smacked me to hell and back. when she realized wut she had done, she cut herself too. we just sat there in the hospital room bleeding and crying. wut do i do? im sorry about it but i promised to help her and i couldnt hold back any longer. please help me.
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running is only the best option if you're in a race.

[ivonne]

hi Ciara,

it's tough isn't it?

My tip for you is to keep doing what you been doing. There is a number of things you have been doing really well. You couldn't have stopped cutting in the first place if there isn't something you learned and did well.

So more of that! Go back to the skills you learned to stop cutting when you stopped.

The other thing that really seems to work, something you have also been doing: TALK. Talk about what is going on inside you. Talk about the pain that is being touched by your friend being in the hospital. Vent, rage, talk about it, on here or someplace else. I think the only place not to talk about it would be to your friend in the hospital, it seems like when you do that things spiral out of control and, like last night, you both end up cutting yourself... So find people who are willing to listen and talk.

There's a lot of people like that on here and you have found them today, in writing this post. Keep doing that. You are doing allright Ciara, one backslide doesn't mean you've lost it. It means you slipped a little, you can regain your balance.

Remember what I said about taking care of yourself? This is what I was getting at. You need to keep talking about your own issues, you need to make sure you get enough sleep and enough support for yourself, in order to be there for your friend. Put Ciara first... your friend needs you to be okay, you need to be okay...

take good care of yourself... it is not just a saying, I mean it!

Ivonne
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We don’t see things as they are,
we see them as we are.
–-Anaîs Nin

[ciara]

ok! dont go all protective on me!!! ill take care of myself. im sorry i did it and everything. i wont do it again.
_________________
running is only the best option if you're in a race.

[ivonne]

okay, that's more like it...

grin...

Ivonne
_________________
We don’t see things as they are,
we see them as we are.
–-Anaîs Nin

[lostandhopeless]

well,i dont know y she doesnt want u to be protective, ivonne. i think its kinda cute. or funny or something like that.
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I will waylay thee going home; where if it be thy chance to kill me- thous kill'st me like a rogue and a villian. -Sir. Toby Belch Shakespeare's play "The Twelfth Night"

[ivonne]

I think it's because she knows I warned her about taking good care of herself so she wouldn't backslide...

Grin... I didn't quite tell her I told you so, but I came pretty close...

I'm glad you think it is cute...

Ivonne
_________________
We don’t see things as they are,
we see them as we are.
–-Anaîs Nin

[lostandhopeless]

well it is. its funny.
_________________
I will waylay thee going home; where if it be thy chance to kill me- thous kill'st me like a rogue and a villian. -Sir. Toby Belch Shakespeare's play "The Twelfth Night"

[Maria13]

highly.