Jealousy

[Suzanne]

I suffer this terribly and just wonder if it is because of self image. I believe it is because I know that I do not like myself most of the time and so find it hard that my husband can like me.

I cannot even bear to think of my husband finding a woman in a picture pretty!

[phoenix soul]

you're not the only one who suffers extreme jealousy. i also hate myself so maybe thats why. i don't see what my husband sees in me i think he's blind. i'm ugly and fat and disgusting and worthless i don't understand why he's with me but he says he loves me and he says i'm beautiful but i don't believe him i see beautiful girls and i cringe just thinking that he'd rather be with them. so yeah you're not the only one with extreme jealousy.

phoenix
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if teddy bears could talk what would they say?

[YankeeBob]

....you know Self Esteem is something we are not born with.

If we were raised in a loving family, supportive community...then we would grow with a sense of self worth, of love, and of belonging.

Since many of us on this site missed out on those support skills....we may have low self esteem issues.

You may want to do so further reading on this topic of self esteem when you are ready.

Alternatively you may find reading on "body image" helpful.

take care. be well.
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Courage to Change

[suz]

YankeeBob, why do you believe issues lack of communit and support is something that is more common for people on this forum?

It is what I've often thought although I've not seem people mention it as a cause of low self-esteem. I know I've neve belonged or been loved or appreciated. I don't know who I am or what the point of my life is or what the point of doing anything at all is. I don't know if there's anything good about me or if I'm just a low-functioning automaton. I don't know how any of that could ever change if I'm not ever having positive and supportive feedback fom the world.

On the other hand, the one peson who is in my life who should be supportive of me makes me feel horrible about myself. It feels like he hates my guts and he makes it a point to let me know how he feels about me. Always negative, always putting me down, always making negative insinuations about my actions like they're just plain wrohg in some way. Neve appreciative or pointing out the good. Yet he still clings to me like he's got nothing better to do than put up with someone like me.

I think if you have a husband that tells you you're beautiful but doesn't make you feel beautiful, that's a bad sign. Sometimes our instincts know better how a person genuinely feels towads us. Sometimes their actions contradict their words or they contradict themselves.