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I don't want your love

 
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Tasha
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Joined: 03 Mar 2011
Posts: 90

PostPosted: Mon Jun 20, 2011 8:03 am    Post subject: I don't want your love Reply with quote

I am trying so hard...sooo hard to just be at peace with my sister. I have thrown over $1000 into her wedding for her. She hasn't even put in $100. Every day is a stupid battle with her. I can't sneeze without her throwing something in my face. Today, I about lost it and smacked her. I got dad a new game for the xbox. I'm getting him games because even though the xbox is mine, I know he will get one when I leave and I want him to have something to play. So we are all sitting on the couch and he asks when I am gonna move. At first we were all thinking he was going to try to kick me out or something but then he said it was because he wanted to know how long he had to save for an xbox. And I started to answer seriously. I got to say this much before my sister interrupted.

"I don't know. At least a year maybe...."
sister interrupts.
"A year?! You could be 21 by then!"

Honestly, at that point, my anger boiled up and I grabbed whatever I had closest to throw. Thank the Holy Banana God that it was a pillow in my lap. I threw it right at her face and she started to say things like "Jeez...anger management." And I interrupted her and said "If you would shut up and listen once in a while you'd know I was going to say because that's how long I have to be here at this college." But she kept jabbering away with her stupid man who kept saying "That's assault, brotha." and she was saying she could call the cops and that someday I was going to grab a chair and throw it at someone and hurt them. I laughed out of anger and told her I'd throw it at her.

Every time I say something one of them has to push me. If I am not out the door by 2:10 for work, they say "Tasha you're late! You're going to lose your job! You're late!" I know they are just teasing me but I have told them every day that it's not funny and is making me mad. They just don't want to listen. I am trying my freaking hardest to give them what they want and to be a good person but they are just pushing me further and further each day. It's getting to the point where I am about to just lose my control and let them both have a verbal beating of a lifetime.

Maybe I am being selfish or whatever but honestly, the constant teasing hurts. it's going too far and I want it to stop. I don't stand up for myself much and i know I need to but what is the point? What's the point in any of this crap? REally....WHAT IS THE POINT?!

i've protected her, loved her, and tried to do anything i could for her to love me back. now i'm trying to buy her love and she still refuses to give it. I just dont even want it anymore. i have no desire to have it. she can keep it.
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Tasha
Junior Member
Junior Member


Joined: 03 Mar 2011
Posts: 90

PostPosted: Mon Jun 20, 2011 8:16 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Im cleaning my room so i can le tmy hamster urn around in his ball that i got him today and i went ot put scisors in the kitchen where they go and kaitlyhn just says not to pickon joe. i was just goin to pu t them away so i just stood there and looked at her. and then she says " go somewhere please" ilooked at dad and all he can say is "both of you be nice" now all i want to do is cut an dcry. i'm so sick of her.
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